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    • Issue 6
Illustration By @sherrryne


My most prized possession is a plush otter I named Otto. Otto is the indirect representation of parts of me as well as the thing I find most solace in. He does not speak nor does he judge, he simply is there which is more meaningful than anyone will ever know. Going to campus everyday, I saw other people bringing around plushies of every shape and size, a small golden bear, a lamb with a pink bowtie, even a snorlax pokemon plush, everyone now has their own emotional support plushie. But why is it that at the ripe age of 22 am I so attached to a stuffed otter? Why do I bring him to every debate tournament?  Why do I speak to him like he's a real person and gravitate to him every time I feel sad?

I did an egregious amount of research and now know an exorbitant amount about plushies, which I am now going to share with the general public. The general premise is that plushies act as transitional objects, a phrase coined by Donald Winnicott, a psychoanalyst in the 1950s. A transitional object is the idea that a child chooses a comforting object outside of their parents which essentially bridges the gap between self reliance and total dependence on a parent. Since plush animals represent warmth, safety, and home, this allows the child to feel secure when exploring the world around them.

This is important because it's similar to the reason why adults like plushies too, the analysis will be based on D.W. Winnicott’s and his ideas on transitional objects and some personal anecdotes. So the idea is that there are external items like blankets or stuffed animals that children have attachment to during early childhood. These are called transitional items that serve as a bridge between the child's internal world and external one, and are meant to provide a source of comfort and reassurance. The ability for transitional objects to a constant presence means that they can offer stability and familiarity during times of uncertainty or anxiety. 

Even though the concept is usually associated with early childhood, it can be extended to adulthood. Plushies give us that sensory comfort, being soft and sometimes fluffy, means that it itches that part of our brains that associates softness with safety. There's also the obvious sentimental connotations with plushies, a lot of us have been gifted plushies, sometimes by our parents when we were young, by friends, or have plushies of our favourite animals. One of my plushies is a squishmallow cow my best friend gave me and named after the 14 year old alter ego we gave each other. I bought her one in turn. Maria is one of my prized possessions that I still sleep beside every night because she reminds me of my best friend, reminds me of the love that I share with her even if she's overseas right now. Plushies are also easy reminders of safety and taps into our survival instinct as an adult, when things are hard and scary, we revert to a thing that represents hope and comfort and good. It’s therapeutic with the need of direct expression.

Some criticism suggests plush toys are a tactic to delay adulthood and an indication of Peter Pan syndrome in young adults, but the counter argument is much more persuasive (plus, can you really blame people for wanting to delay adulthood?). That being said, researchers like Joshua Dale, a professor at Chuo University in Tokyo, Japan explains in an article for Independent. Co. UK that “seeing something cute trips the neural networks in our brain and makes us engage in behaviours like empathy or a sense of playfulness. It works so well that we feel it towards cats and dogs and even objects like Squishmallows.” The blushing, smiley expression given to these toys – even if that toy is just a fuzzy cabbage – can make them even more cherubic. “If you see something that has a smile, it means that thing is willing to engage with us and we want to get closer to it,” he adds.

There's also the bigger picture, pragmatic rationale why we as young people gravitate towards plushies. It’s a mixture of human instinct and the way we process the world around us. Right now in what most people call the prime of our lives but it honestly doesn't feel like it, we are chasing everything and probably also being crushed by the weight of it all. We're all worried about assignments, how we’re going to get a job, whether that guy/girl/person will text us back, if our moms actually like us, the fact everything is expensive in Subang, how we’re broke, inflation, climate change and literal war. 

And the rest of the world has caught on, businesses are tapping into what’s called the “joy economy” in which consumers seek out comfort and nostalgia in products and experiences, especially when faced with economic or political pressures. “The economy, the wars, everything is really depressing and serious, whereas toys just bring a little bit of joy back into life,” Melissa Symonds, executive director of Toys at Circana said in an interview.  The recently popularised stuffed animal brand Jellycat has benefited from that trend, Jellycat saw its revenue rise 66% to £333 million in 2024, up from £200 million in 2023. 

It’s pretty easy to feel hopeless and that world is too sharp and spiky for a 20 something year old. But that’s where the plushie comes in, something small enough to cradle in your arms, to hold at night when it’s quiet and you want peace. Our plushies remind us that love is supposed to be gentle and soft. The tenderness when we hold our plushies tells us that things are going to be alright, it’s a comfort in a very messed up and confusing world. They are safe in our arms and we are too. Passing along all our worries and fears, safe and sound in the heart of your teddy.

If you have a plushie when it's a gift or one from childhood or one you randomly decided to get, you should give it a hug right about now, they probably miss you and you do deserve it.

Sometimes you don’t have to carry your burdens alone, you can carry your plushie instead :) 
 
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Illustration by @kyliee.y


There’s something about tragedies that make them wistfully haunting, and so much more terrifying than the average horror. Perhaps it’s the complexity that comes with the changed person; a person who grieves mindlessly starts to grow around the sorrow that takes root in their guts. And when the sorrow blooms, you find that they’ve become someone entirely different.

Settling on various characters’ accounts, ‘Monstrilio’ pushes a raw and almost vulgar narrative of grief and a clumsy search for identity in full display.

The Mother, Father, and Lung
The book begins with the death of 11-year-old Santiago. Seeking to be closer to him past skin-to-skin, Magos—his mother—cuts out a piece of his only lung in the quiet of the night. His father, Joseph grieves differently in a more visibly distraught manner, with messy hair and pitiful listlessness. Magos leaves Joseph and returns to Mexico with Santiago’s lung, where she learns of a local folktale: a heart that, once fed, became a man.

So, she feeds the lung and names it Monstrilio… and it grows, sentient and more aware than anybody expects it to be.

Grief and the Changed Person: Magos and Joseph
We tend to talk about grief as an emotion that will wash over us like a wave—sometimes the wave lasts longer, but it eventually goes. However, ‘Monstrilio’ depicts grief as the ‘Changed Person’: take Magos and Joseph. After the death of Santiago, their relationship crumbles almost instantaneously as the both of them are warped (or rather, transformed) by different versions of grief.

Throughout most of the book, Magos seems to not know where to put her feelings. She performs the person she was before her son died, to herself and to others. She finds Joseph less interesting, as Joseph loses himself in his grief. He falls apart like a stack of cards and wonders why Magos doesn’t grieve.

Yet, we see Magos’ grief very clearly in her thoughts and actions. No rational person would stick her hands into her dead son’s chest and carry a piece of his lung with her to feel closer to him, except a grieving mother. No rational person would feed a lung chicken broth because of a folktale with an organ-turned-human creature, except a grieving mother. And that was exactly who Magos was, a mother drowning in her grief. And ironically enough, her grief seemingly became a lung for her, thumping in survival mode like it did for her son.

Towards halfway through the book, in Berlin, Magos could hardly face the truth as Monstrilio grew into a human-looking teen—one that she imagined Santiago would’ve looked like. So, she starts calling him ‘Santiago’.

On the contrary, Joseph differentiated Monstrilio and Santiago almost clearly enough and called the no-longer Monstrilio by ‘M’. After the divorce with Magos, Joseph had moved back to New York and eventually welcomed a new partner in his life, Peter. He notes that with Peter, marriage didn’t feel as heavy as it did with Magos. He reflects on his relationship with Magos, and it seemed rooted in being the cocoon for her confident self. Joseph liked Magos’ confidence as much as he liked the way she showed her vulnerability only to him, and with Magos and Santiago, it made him feel grander than he ever believed himself to be.

Without Santiago, one could say that it broke his worldview—his married life with Magos had felt like a ‘forever’ thing, after all, and losing someone who supposedly completed that ‘forever’ threw a dissonant wrench in the equation.

Ultimately, this grief became a central experience in both of their lives, and as they grew around it and added more fragments to themselves, their past selves became more minuscule with each day till recognition turned impossible. Sitting heavy like a mast above the deck of a ship, perhaps this grief means Magos and Joseph are no longer who they once knew each other to be.

M the Statue, Monstrilio the Incomplete, and Santiago the Clay
“M kept rubbing the stump on his left hip, the remains of his arm-tail. Magos kept caressing a body that was not there.”

After the lung of Santiago—which Magos believed to be the core of Santiago’s ‘Santiagoness’—grew into Monstrilio, a little furry lung-creature with an arm-tail sticking out from its left, Magos and Joseph projected their dead son onto it. To them, it was a miracle, a panacea if you will: it would bring back Santiago, it would fix their crumbling marriage, it would restore their lives to what it once was.

But as Monstrilio grew, it clearly demonstrated a non-Santiagoness. In fact, it wasn’t human at all, mauling small animals alive for fun and to eat. Magos asks Lena, her best friend and a surgeon, to remove Monstrilio’s arm-tail, thinking it to be the cause of its wildness. And for some time after its removal, Monstrilio did become meeker, or so they thought.

“They are happy to believe I forgot how they maimed me.”

Monstrilio, without its arm-tail, eventually grew into M, a young teenage boy with hardly anything on him reminiscent of his ‘Monstrilioness’ besides the stump on his left hip and a tuft of stubble on his forehead (his shaved fur). From his dialogue, M seems to separate himself from Santiago and Monstrilio distinctly, addressing them by ‘you’ in his thoughts.

However, M retains the memories from his time as Monstrilio, and occasionally memories from Santiago surfaces albeit little and faintly.

“Telling me I’m M does not afford the clarity they think it does.”

Like a child living for the first time still, M comes off mostly as innocent despite his wild instincts to consume meat flavoured with… fear. He questions who he is even as he tells Joseph, “This is M.”

In one of their conversations, Joseph notes that M asks him whether Joseph knew what he was without the hint of anger or malice that would've been expected of the situation. This comes towards the end of the book, after a series of events show M struggling between his Monstrilioness and Santiagoness.

Or rather, what he is and what he thinks he ought to be.

“But I won’t write this memory down. Seems silly. Keeping these. You’re not coming back.”

Magos throws a grand artistic act of grief in Berlin themed ‘SON’ on stage, and M watches along with Joseph and everybody else central at this point of the story.

She finally distinguishes between Santiago and Monstrilio or M (not that the difference between Monstrilio and M registered as much for her, though), wrecking her body with hopeless sobs and an out-of-breathness akin to her son’s dying breaths.

Then, perhaps tired of being perceived as either ‘Santiago the Clay’ and ‘Monstrilio the Incomplete’, M makes his own choice to fully assume his existence as the ‘Statue’.

He eats.

“But I don’t panic. The panic is not mine to carry anymore. I can let it go.”

And at the end, Magos and Joseph let him go, along with the lung of their son.

Verdict
Insanely unfiltered and heart-breaking, I would say ‘Monstrilio’ makes it to my list of great debut novels to read.

It succinctly pulls out the horror in tragedy, loss and grief, and centres the characters’ search for an identity within a tornado of emotions in the mix.

Personally, my favourite part of the story was exploring the becoming of M—I wouldn't say it was an unapologetic becoming, but the element of pacing back and forth between wanting to be yourself and holding back because of the perception of others made it ever so real and raw.

Overall, I rate ‘Monstrilio’ an 8 out of 10. It's so worth the read for those wanting something horrifically satisfying, and you can finish it in one sitting or over the weekend depending on your attention span.

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Iluustration By @muthi4hhsh

Has your social media feed been flooded with posts and edits about Prime TV’s new book-to-TV adaptation, Off Campus? Well, mine definitely has. Upon first glance, I quickly and rather judgmentally assumed the show might be another regretful watch of badly written dialogue, distasteful, cringeworthy romance, and stereotypical characters. However, after talking about the show with a friend and, of course, watching some very tempting edits, I decided to give it a try, and boy, was I surprised. 

The show takes place in the exciting and unfortunately fictional “Briar University" and follows the lives of a friend group of four lovable hockey players and other students on campus as they navigate adulthood, friendships, family, their passions, and, of course, love. The show follows a concept similar to Bridgerton and focuses on a new couple each season. The first season focuses on the romance between the hardworking and musically gifted Hannah Wells and the hockey captain of the Briar Hawks, Garrett Graham, as they navigate a fake-dating scheme that starts as a harmless plot for mutual gain, but ends with a heartwarming romance and a found family. Although this show may sound like your average jock-meets-studious-girl-and-falls-in-love-despite-being-from-different-worlds-kind of tale, this show dismantles all those clichés and boring tropes we usually expect to instead deliver a nuanced story of character growth, healing, and the kind of love most fantasize about. The show skips over exaggerated drama and toxicity, which we unfortunately see in too many shows, from backstabbing friends and messy love triangles to meltdowns from nonchalant male leads with anger issues and instead delivers healthy communication and heartwarming friendships. 

The show allowed viewers to challenge their ideas of what romantic dynamics may look like today, especially when relationships are so heavily influenced by toxic standards perpetuated online. Despite Hannah and Garrett’s relationship starting as transactional, when their bond grows, they don't play the long game and revel in their differences and suffer; instead, they explore and truly get to know one another. As they grow closer, both characters help each other grow and heal from their past through unfiltered conversations and care, which was extremely refreshing to see. In the past, we see female leads used as a means to calm their love interests down; we are shown that their timid and nurturing nature is vital to deal with the cold and abusive tendencies of their male leads. Instead, Hannah and Garrett work together to navigate traumatic pasts through respectful conversations and ultimately become each other's rock and sources of comfort. On the other hand, we see a similar rejection of typical stereotypes in the exciting relationship between Hannah and Garrett’s friends, Allie Hayes and Dean DiLaurentis. Both of these fun-loving, bubbly characters find themselves in a rather casual but complicated relationship, but despite Dean’s playful personality, he brings emotional understanding to the relationship while Allie pushes herself out of her comfort zone and allows herself to be messy and navigate the type of relationship she needs, challenging the gender roles that we typically see in these kinds of situations.

However, it's not just the romantic relationships in the show that challenge the norms we are accustomed to, but also the platonic ones, too. Male friendship is a pivotal part of the entire series, as it centers around the four close-knit friends and hockey players, Garrett, John Logan, Dean, and John Tucker. In the media, male friendship is unfortunately often depicted as immature, emotionally barren, and low-maintenance. Off Campus switches out this outdated and honestly tiring idea for genuinely heartwarming connections, from the brotherly affection shared by Garrett and Logan, as well as Beau and Dean, to the overall familial connection the four boys share. Throughout the entire show, we witness the fun and comedic male characters freely express their grievances with their friends, give each other constructive criticism, and create a safe space for one another. 

On the other hand, although girlhood and female friendships are often celebrated in the media, certain small details in the relationships between the female characters make them much more enjoyable. Off Campus skips the competition often pushed upon female relationships, especially in romantic situations, and gives its viewers authentic and valuable dynamics. Throughout the show, Hannah’s relationship with Garrett is never challenged by the “puck bunnies” or, quite literally, anyone else, and not once are any of the characters pitted against each other for the sake of male attention. Although this “competition” is initially assumed by viewers (at least, I did) with the introduction of Kendall, a puck bunny Garrett had a previous casual relationship with, her feelings towards Garrett and her grievances about their relationship aren't expressed through her sabotaging or humiliating Hannah, instead, she and Garrett maturely discuss how they both felt, and not once does she even blame Hannah.

Similarly, in the friendship between Hannah and Allie, there isn't any bad blood, only love, support, comfort, and judgment-free sisterhood. Even though both friends are quite different as individuals, they both thrive off one another and bond over even the most mundane aspects of their lives. Throughout watching the show, I found myself comparing Hannah and Allie to The Summer I Turned Pretty’s Belly and Taylor. In The Summer I Turned Pretty, both friends are very different, just like in Off Campus, but Belly's and Taylor’s dynamic is confined to stereotypes of a shy friend and a popular, pretty friend. This from season one creates a rift between the two friends and space for conflict and jealousy within their sisterly bond, and we often see one or the other arguing about issues that often revolve around… a man, and of course conflict is normal in friendships, but I find Allie and Hannah’s bond to be much more realistic, enjoyable, and healthy, as their friendship is never bound by tropes and storylines that are ultimately male-centered.

But it's not just the dynamics in the show that stand out, but the characters themselves. Hannah is presented as an independent individual who’s hardworking and doesn't allow herself to be controlled by the opinions of others, especially the men in the show, but Hannah isn't just a “girlboss”; she's vulnerable, studious, free-spirited, and most importantly, not defined by her trauma. Like students normally do in university, Hannah explores who she is, has fun nights out with her friends, and takes chances, even the potentially messy ones. Another character whom I found to be quite nuanced was John Logan, the lovable and handy jock. In this first season of the show, Logan, on the surface, seems to be stuck in a love triangle and a conflicting relationship with his best friend, Garrett. However, that's not the case at all; Logan finds himself torn by the realities of his familial and financial situation, which creates this detachment between him and those closest to him, as he carries the burden of having to succeed for his family. Even his envy towards Garrett’s upbringing and financial security isn't one-dimensional, as, despite all that conflict, Logan is a loving and loyal friend. However, the facet of Logan I found most interesting this season is his “feelings” for Hannah, which instead mask a feeling most of us know all too well: the gut-wrenching thought that you’re falling behind. With Logan’s character, Off Campus trades in the overdone love triangle for a deeper discussion of an experience most young adults endure: loneliness and the disconnect you may feel from your friends who are in different phases of life, such as loving relationships of comfort and security, or succeeding in an area you feel like you aren’t. But despite all this, Logan isn’t confined to a pitiful and broody archetype; he's witty, funny, and a team player. Pleasantly, such layered stories aren’t just found in a selected few characters, every character in the show is fun and refreshingly chalant while providing more nuanced perspectives on identity and personal struggles, from a frat brother who loves theatre and has a great relationship with his sister to free-spirited friends who are goal-driven and determined. The series depicts individuals who are entertaining yet comforting, and allows viewers to find pieces of themselves in various characters

The show speaks to the confusing time in your life where you’re not a teenager anymore, but you’re definitely not an adult either, and you feel like you’re stuck in this odd place of trying to figure out who you are and what you want. The show encourages exploration and shows viewers that the awkward moments you experience are natural and part of your growth. I mean, who hasn't made a Spotify playlist about their crush before and made a picture of them the cover? However, you may be left feeling that all this sounds really good, but it's also highly unrealistic, but that may not be the case. Throughout our lives, many, if not most of us, have pictured what our futures may look like or tried to understand ourselves through the media we consume. In much of that media, whether it's TV shows or YouTube videos, we see characters, people, and relationships confined to a certain idea or trope, and eventually, we try to confine ourselves and our experiences to those same boxes and try to put labels on things in an attempt to understand ourselves. We see this continue even today on social media as we change ourselves to fit tropes and ideas of being "whimsical," "nonchalant," or “I can fix him." In some cases, these tropes we try to portray in our lives may not be healthy and may do more damage than we think. Often we may end up feeling insecure and conflicted when we don't fit the box. However, healthier depictions of relationships and identity can allow us to change our mindsets to create an environment that ultimately puts us first, as at the end of the day, we’re all different in one way or another and need different things to thrive.


Off Campus is exciting and silly but provides viewers with the important representation during these confusing times in our lives that our experiences aren’t linear, that we should use these moments in our lives to grow, that we should strike up a conversation with a new person or go to an unconventional function with our friends, and that we can do all this while sticking to our goals and being hardworking. Our experiences, relationships, and identities aren’t one-dimensional concepts that have to be categorized. We shouldn’t restrict our friendships and relationships to what we've been shown they should look like. You can tell your homie about how tough this semester has been, you don't have to normalize toxic friendships, and you don't have to be nonchalant to the person you like… You just have to be you and do what is best for you and those you care about. 
 
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Illustration By @zenigiri

For a long time now, I have found myself, and others, gravitating towards reminders of the past. From using my mother’s old iPhone 5 to take pictures to creating a Tumblr blog, I’ve fallen deeper and deeper into this rabbit hole of trying to recreate the past… or at least the version of it I can still remember. In the last few years, popular trends across social media have been heavily influenced by and centered around the romanticization of older trends and nostalgia, such as Y2K, Tumblr Girl, Millennial Optimism, Twee, “2026 is the new 2016,” and even trends of 2020. These trends of nostalgia are not limited to just collages on social media and the use of the “Sol De Janeiro" filter on Instagram, but are instead embedded within most of our media and “trendy” daily habits. In the last few years, we’ve seen an increase in movie sequels, prequels, and remakes of older fan-favourite films, from Disenchanted to the upcoming White Chicks sequel. Nostalgia has also seeped its way into our daily habits as we’ve seen a rise in toys such as squishies, slime, Tamagotchis, and fidgets, as well as an increased use of older or analog technology, such as film cameras, iPods, and record players.

The obsession with the past that currently plagues our lives can be interpreted as a coping mechanism. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology researched the types of situations in which people typically become nostalgic. It was then shown that nostalgia was frequently reported to be triggered by negative emotions and situations, particularly loneliness. 

Our current world, post-COVID-19, has been fundamentally reshaped by the pandemic, changing our "norms" and perceptions of what the future holds for us. As the years go by, we witness wars, worsening climate issues, and ongoing humanitarian and economic crises. 
Amidst all this unrest, the current youth choose to immerse themselves in an older and more familiar culture they believe to be representative of better and happier times compared to the world, which we can no longer afford and is being destroyed by climate change. This constant immersion in past aesthetics and trends prevents us from fully understanding our present and imagining a future for ourselves. 

However, nostalgia not only stops us from confronting our reality, but our emphasis on old trends and the romanticization of past time periods negate the struggles and prejudices of the time and even the development of the global society to overcome problematic norms. The return of Tumblr trends in roughly 2021 also revived many harmful trends and beauty standards. These trends brought back toxic aesthetics like “sad girl," an Internet culture that romanticized self-destructive behaviours and the characterization of mental illness as a “quirky” trait, as well as trends that glorified harmful and inappropriate relationships and idolized pop figures like Lana Del Rey and media such as Lolita and Pretty Little Liars. “Thinspiration” and eating disorder culture also quickly rose back to fame as we began taking fashion inspiration from the 2000s and early 2010s, with figures such as Victoria's Secret angels, Kate Moss, and Bella Swan serving as style icons. The glorification of these fashion eras subtly reintroduces toxic, exclusionary beauty standards that threaten body positivity movements that worked hard for inclusivity. 

As we romanticize 2016, we often fail to recognize the harmful events of the year, from political instability caused by Brexit and other political changes to the start of ongoing humanitarian crises. But this lack of awareness cannot be explained solely by youthful ignorance. We see this again with the rise of nostalgia surrounding 2020, a year we all very well know to be filled with tragedy and isolation, a time of racial violence, people losing their jobs and businesses, and millions of lives being lost to the pandemic. Nostalgia selectively alters our perception of the past and conveniently ignores the struggles of the time. This ignorance puts us at risk of repeating mistakes, undermines the impacts of issues and events, and pushes for false historical narratives. These detrimental trends, repackaged as “nostalgia,” promote regressive ideologies and trap youth in a cycle of reliving flawed trends and devalue our societal growth from the past, whilst blinding us from historical realities. 

While nostalgia is a pivotal part of life that allows us to reflect upon our memories and serves as proof of a joyful existence, being trapped in it prevents growth. Our dependence on nostalgia for comfort and to deflect from our fear of the future can lead to hopelessness and stifle our ability for personal and societal progress. Without acknowledging and engaging with our present, we cannot work towards solving the issues we are afraid of and keep getting stuck in a place of rumination, sadness, and disconnection. It is important to learn from our past and see how far we have come, but it is equally integral to create new memories. The beauty of the future is that it holds endless possibilities for innovation, creativity, and change. There is so much around us we have yet to explore, but we cannot do that unless we step away from the doomscroll under #nostalgia. 

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Illustration by  @josephine

There are cities that begin quietly. A river nearby, a ruler with a blueprint, perhaps a polite agreement or two. Ancient Rome, however, seems to have skipped that phase entirely. Before emperors, marble temples, and the rise of an empire that would shape the ancient world, Rome existed first as a story. Strange, dramatic, and just slightly unbelievable. Its origins are tangled in prophecy, betrayal, divine intervention, and one particularly unforgettable wolf, blurring the line between history and myth until it becomes almost impossible to separate the two. 

At the heart of it all stand two brothers: Romulus and Remus, abandoned to the river, raised beneath the shadow of legend, and destined to change the course of history forever. Their story unfolds like a theatre production written by fate itself—complete with stolen thrones, sacred boundaries, and a conflict that turned a beginning into a tragedy. So, here are seven legendary moments that gave rise to one of the most iconic civilizations the world has ever known.

1. The Prophecy that Threatened a Throne
Long before Rome existed, the kingdom of Alba Longa was already unraveling from within. The rightful king, Numitor, was overthrown by his younger brother, Amulius, who seized the throne for himself in a move that proved ancient royal families were every bit as dramatic as mythology suggests. But, stolen crowns rarely come without paranoia. Amulius feared that Numitor’s bloodline might one day return to reclaim power, especially after whispers of prophecy began circling through the kingdom. To secure his rule, he decided that the safest heir was no heir at all. And so, Numitor’s daughter, Rhea Silvia, was forced into becoming a Vestal Virgin, sworn to a life of chastity and silence. It was meant to end the family line permanently. Instead, it quietly set the stage for the birth of Ancient Rome itself, much to Amulius’s dismay. History, after all, has a habit of ignoring carefully made plans.

2. Rhea Silvia and The Weight of Fate
For Amulius, forcing Rhea Silvia into becoming a Vestal Virgin was meant to be the end of the story. Bound to a sacred vow of chastity, she was never supposed to marry, bear children, or continue Numitor’s bloodline. It was the perfect solution: no children, no rivals, no prophecy fulfilled. But, it did not stay that way for long. According to Roman legend, Rhea Silvia was visited by Mars, the god of war himself, and soon gave birth to twin sons: Romulus and Remus. Whether the story was believed as divine intervention or later woven into myth to glorify Rome’s origins, the effect remained the same. The heirs Amulius feared had arrived anyway. What was meant to silence a dynasty had instead given birth to something far more dangerous. And somewhere beyond the palace walls, fate was already beginning to move quietly into place.

3. The Abandonment at the River
When Amulius learned of the twins’ birth, the prophecy he had tried so carefully to prevent finally began to feel inescapable. The solution he chose was not mercy, but distance. If the children could not exist within the palace, then they would not exist at all. Romulus and Remus were placed into a basket and set adrift on the waters of the Tiber River. It was meant to be a quiet ending, one carried out not with spectacle but with certainty—the kind of disappearance that leaves no argument behind. However, the river did not cooperate with that intention. Instead of swallowing the twins, the current carried them to safety along its banks, where the story begins to shift from execution to survival. In that fragile pause between intention and outcome, the twins were still alive, and the story had already begun to shift its shape.

4. The She-Wolf’s Intervention
At the edge of the wild where the Tiber River softens into marsh and forest, the fate of the abandoned twins, Romulus and Remus, takes a turn no decree from Amulius could have accounted for. The twins were found in a place that belonged neither fully to civilization nor to wilderness. It is here that Roman tradition introduces one of its most enduring images: a lupa, which means a she-wolf in Latin. Roman tradition describes a she-wolf discovering the infants and sheltering them, offering warmth and protection long enough for them to endure the first fragile stretch of life that should not have been possible. Whether understood as mythic truth or symbolic memory, the detail holds its place because it explains something essential: the twins did not simply escape death, they were carried through it.

Later, a shepherd named Faustulus would discover the children and raise them, but the wolf never fully disappears from the story. It lingers as something more than an event—an origin marked by wildness, protection, and an unsettling sense that Rome was never entirely separated from the world that first kept it alive. 

5. The Return to Bloodline
In history, time does not erase beginnings like this. It only hides them until they grow heavy enough to resurface. Romulus and Remus, raised away from the palace and the name they were born into, eventually grew into young men shaped by survival rather than privilege. Life near the banks of the Tiber River had sharpened them into figures who moved through the world with a quiet sense of something unfinished. The truth of their origin did not arrive dramatically. It surfaced slowly, through recognition, fragments of memory, and stories that refused to stay buried. They were not just children of the wilderness; they were heirs of Numitor, the rightful king of Alba Longa who had been overthrown by Amulius. The return to that knowledge changes everything. Identity sharpens into purpose, and purpose gathers momentum. The past they were removed from begins to call them back, not as boys who survived a river, but as names that history had already been trying to erase.

6. The Line Drawn on Palatine Hill
The return to their bloodline does not settle into peace. Instead, it narrows into direction. With Amulius overthrown and Numitor restored, the world they came from briefly falls back into order. But for Romulus and Remus, restoration is not the same as belonging. Something has already shifted too far to remain still. They choose not to remain in Alba Longa. Instead, they turn back toward the land near the Tiber River, where their survival once began, and where something new begins to take shape. On the slopes of the Palatine Hill, Romulus turns the ground into intention. A line is drawn—first faint, then certain—cutting through dust and silence as though it has always been there, only now revealed. It is not yet a city, but it is already a boundary, and boundaries have a way of becoming permanent faster than they are questioned. Remus looks upon it and sees something different. Where one brother sees foundation, the other sees a claim. Where one sees the future, the other sees exclusion beginning to take shape. Between them, the line does not remain just earth marked by hand. It becomes something heavier. An early shape of authority, and the first silence of disagreement that neither of them steps back from.

7. The First Death of Rome
The accounts vary in tone and detail, but the moment remains consistent in its consequence: defiance meets finality. On the slopes of the Palatine Hill, Romulus draws a line into the earth. It is not a wall yet, not stone or structure, but it is treated as something closer to law than soil. It marks where the city begins. It also marks where it is forbidden to go. Remus steps over it. The act is simple in movement, but not in meaning. It reads as dismissal of the boundary itself, as if the line is not sacred, not binding, not worthy of obedience. In a place where authority is still being created, that kind of gesture does more than provoke. It unsettles the entire idea of what the city is trying to become. Romulus does not hesitate. He reacts as someone who understands that the first rule of a new foundation is that it must be enforceable. Remus is struck down. The act is immediate. There is no reversal, no negotiation, no space for reconsideration. Silence follows—not the peaceful kind, but the kind that feels newly created, as if the world itself has not yet learned how to hold what just happened. Rome is no longer an idea shared between brothers. It becomes singular. It becomes irreversible. And in that transformation, its foundation is sealed in absence, in fracture, in the kind of loss that does not fade but settles into history like a permanent echo. 

A Foundation That Remembers What It Cost
To conclude, Rome’s birth does not end with celebration. It ends with a foundation that remembers what it cost. Rome grows from that single irreversible moment, carrying forward the weight of its earliest decision. What begins as myth settles into identity: a city shaped by prophecy, survival, and a fracture that cannot be repaired. Romulus remains as both builder and witness to the silence that follows. Remus remains in absence, fixed into the origin like a shadow the city cannot step out of. And perhaps that is why Rome endures in memory the way it does. Not because it begins cleanly, but because it begins honestly—through ambition, through conflict, and through a moment that turns a boundary into permanence. Every empire has a start. Rome’s start simply refuses to pretend it was gentle.


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Illustration by @Najaame_

There was a time when having a hobby meant very little to anyone but you. It did not need to be good, useful, or seen. It did not need to lead anywhere. It simply existed as something you enjoyed, something that filled time without needing to justify itself.

Somewhere along the way, that version of hobbies disappeared. Not suddenly, not dramatically, but quietly enough that most of us did not notice it happening.

Now, the moment you pick something up, it is evaluated for its potential. Bake a cake, and someone asks if you are selling it. Learn to crochet, and you are told to open a shop. Start going to the gym, and it becomes content. What used to be a personal interest quickly turns into something outward-facing, something that could be shared, or turned into something profitable.

For university students, this shift feels almost unavoidable. We are constantly surrounded by the idea that we should be building something, improving something, or becoming something. Free time begins to feel less like a break and more like an opportunity. If you are not using it to gain experience or create value, it can feel like you are falling behind.

Hobbies, in the way they once existed, are slowly disappearing. What replaces them looks similar on the surface, but carries a different expectation. It is no longer enough to enjoy something. It has to go somewhere.

Disappearance of Free Time
What has changed is not just how we spend our time, but how we understand it. Free time used to mean the absence of obligation. Now, it often feels like unclaimed potential. Something that could be used better, something that should not be wasted.

This way of thinking does not come from nowhere. We grow up in systems where almost everything is measured, evaluated, and compared. Over time, that logic extends beyond academics or careers and begins to shape how we see our personal lives. The idea that time should always be productive does not stop when the workday ends. It follows us into our evenings, weekends, even the spaces that were once meant to be separate.

In this context, leisure stops feeling neutral. It becomes a resource. And like any resource, it feels irresponsible not to use it well.
For students, the pressure is constant. There is always something to prepare for, something to improve, something to build. The result is that free time no longer feels like an escape from expectation. It feels like another version of it.

The Guilt of Rest
One of the clearest signs of this shift is how difficult it has become to rest without explanation. Rest now comes with conditions. It needs to be earned or justified. Taking a break feels acceptable after completing something, but much less so on its own.

This creates a quiet but persistent sense of guilt. You might be watching something, scrolling, or even engaging in a hobby, but part of your mind remains elsewhere, asking whether this time could be used more effectively. The experience is familiar. You are technically resting, but it does not feel like rest.
Over time, this changes how we relate to ourselves. When we are consistently rewarded for productivity, we begin to associate our worth with output. Doing nothing, or doing something that leads nowhere, feels like a break in that identity. It creates discomfort, not because rest is wrong, but because it interrupts what we have learned to value.

This is where hobbies begin to lose their original purpose. If an activity cannot be measured or improved, it starts to feel less valid. And when enjoyment itself requires validation, it stops feeling like enjoyment.

Side Hustle Culture Takeover
Side hustle culture did not take over simply because it was appealing. It took over because it made sense. We are living in a landscape where stability feels uncertain, and competition feels constant. Relying on a single path can feel risky. Having something on the side, whether a skill, an income stream, even just a fallback, offers a sense of control. It feels like preparation.

For university students, this logic is reinforced constantly. We are told to stand out, diversify, and make ourselves more employable. Everything we do is evaluated for how it might contribute to that goal. Hobbies are no exception. If something can be turned into experience, income, or visibility, it feels almost irresponsible not to try.

But in doing so, leisure becomes strategic. Instead of asking what we feel like doing, we ask what would be useful to do. One is guided by interest, the other by outcome. When outcome becomes the priority, enjoyment becomes secondary.

This is how hobbies, as they once existed, begin to fade. Not because we no longer care about enjoyment, but because we have learned to prioritise security. Not a single cause, but a combination of pressures that slowly reshape what hobbies are allowed to be.

Buried Together
As hobbies become tied to outcomes, something else dies alongside them. The most immediate loss is freedom. The freedom to do something without expectation or the need for it to lead anywhere.

There is also a loss of privacy. Not everything needs to be shared to be meaningful, but the instinct to document can make it feel otherwise. When experiences are constantly externalised, they risk becoming performances rather than moments. The value shifts from how something feels to how it is received.

More than anything, what disappears is a space where you are allowed to exist without being productive. A space where nothing is being measured or evaluated. That space is difficult to maintain in a culture that places so much emphasis on output.

Hobbies were once that space. In many ways, they no longer are.

Reclaiming What's Left
Maybe hobbies have not disappeared completely. Maybe they have just been buried under expectations, waiting for permission to exist again.

Reclaiming them does not require rejecting ambition or productivity altogether. It might begin with something smaller. Letting one thing in your life remain untouched by the need to become something more.

What would happen if you let yourself be bad at something again? If you painted and never posted it? If you ran without tracking it? If you read without feeling the need to review?

These are small choices, but they challenge something larger. The idea that everything you do needs to lead somewhere.

Because not everything does.

Some things can stay unfinished. Some things can stay unseen. Some things can simply be yours.
And maybe hobbies are not completely gone. Maybe they are still there, in those small moments, waiting to be treated as something that does not need to prove its worth.

Not everything needs to become something.

Some things just need to be alive.

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Illustration By @yeeeshuen

Houseplants have quietly rooted themselves into Gen Z culture, like those guests who came over once and never really left. Scroll through any feed and you’ll find sunlit windowsills crowded with monsteras stretching like they own the place, pothos vines creeping like quiet guardians, and tiny succulents sitting on the desks as if they pay rent with vibes. What used to be simple decoration has taken on a personality of its own. Somewhere along the way, plants stopped being objects and started becoming companions, small responsibilities, and, for some, an oddly accurate reflection of who they are.

It’s not just about the plants themselves, but the little world that has grown around them. Nurseries feel less like stores and more like sanctuaries. There are plant swaps, online communities, and people casually referring to themselves as “plant parents” with the same seriousness and humour. It’s a soft kind of culture, one that doesn’t demand attention but gently grows into your life. And before you realise it, you’re no longer just someone who owns a plant. You’re someone who checks on it, worries about it, and celebrates a new leaf like it’s a personal achievement!

So, why has this quiet little habit grown into something so big? For many Gen Zs, plants offer a kind of comfort that feels almost rare today. In a world filled with constant notifications, deadlines, and the quiet pressure of uncertainty, plants exist at a completely different pace. They simply grow, slowly and steadily, asking only for small, consistent care, instead of demanding instant attention or perfection. Watering a plant after a long day, turning it towards the sunlight,  trimming a leaf, or noticing the first curl of new growth becomes a quiet ritual. It pulls attention away from screens and into something tangible and alive. There is no urgency in it. No competition… No noise. Just a simple exchange of care. Maybe that’s why Gen Z holds onto it so closely. Because in all the noise, plants offer something rare. A kind of calm that doesn’t demand anything back, yet still makes you feel like you’re doing something right and you’re making progress.

And maybe it's not just the calm and comfort. There’s something meaningful about being responsible for something alive. For many Gen Zs, life can still feel a bit in-between. Not quite settled, not quite stable. Pets can be expensive, time-consuming, and a full commitment. Vet bills, food, constant attention, and the guilt of leaving them alone all day. It’s not always realistic. Plants, in a way, become that first step into nurturing. They don’t ask for everything, but they ask for enough. And when you keep one alive, when it actually grows instead of… slowly giving up on you, it feels like a small win. A tiny, green proof that you can care for something, that you can be consistent, that something is thriving because of you. It’s a kind of accomplishment that is  nothing loud or showy. Just a new leaf, unfolding like a soft “you’re doing alright.”

Simultaneously, there’s also the aesthetic layer of it, where plants start becoming part of a visual identity. You see it woven into so many styles Gen Z gravitates toward: cottagecore with its soft, nostalgic, garden-like charm; goblincore with its love for moss, cluttered natural oddities, and earthy chaos; fairycore with delicate vines, dried flowers, and almost storybook-like greenery; forestcore with deep greens, wood textures, and the feeling of being tucked away in something ancient and overgrown. It’s not accidental. Plants are one of the easiest bridges between imagination and space, letting people create environments that feel slightly enchanted, slightly grounded in nature, even if they’re living in the middle of a city.

In a world that’s mostly concrete, screens, and artificial light, adding a bit of green changes the entire mood of a space without needing much effort. It’s a small way of bringing something organic back into daily life, even if it’s just a pot on a desk or a vine by the window. In that sense, it also becomes a gentle return to nature. Not in a grand, world-saving way, but in something more personal and immediate. One plant at a time, one space at a time, it’s a reminder that the natural world doesn’t feel so far away after all. Even something as simple as keeping a plant alive quietly contributes to a sense of connection, and yes, a slightly greener world in its own small, steady way.

So, to conclude, plant parenthood isn’t really about the plants alone. It’s about what happens around them. The small pauses it creates in a day, the habit of checking in on something that depends on you, the quiet satisfaction of noticing change that didn’t exist yesterday. A new leaf. A taller stem. A pot that suddenly feels a little more alive than it did before. It may look simple from the outside, just watering a plant and placing it near a window, but it carries a kind of intention. A willingness to nurture something fragile and stay consistent with it, even when nothing dramatic is happening. Maybe that’s what makes it resonate so strongly with Gen Z. Beneath all the aesthetics and trends, there’s a deeper search for connection in smaller, more tangible forms. Something that doesn’t overwhelm, doesn’t rush, but still grows alongside you.

Additionally, there’s also something quietly grounding about it, almost like learning to trust slow progress again. In a world that often measures everything in speed and visibility, plants remind you that not everything needs to prove itself instantly to matter. Growth can be subtle, almost invisible at times, and still be real. In those small green corners of rooms and routines, plant parenthood becomes more than a habit. It becomes a way of noticing life as it slowly unfolds—one leaf at a time. 

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Etc Magazine

Etc. Magazine is all about bringing you the latest news and updates on various topics, all from the urban Malaysian student’s point of view.

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